17 November 2009

Overcome by events

It's 8:00, I'm trying to write a paper about the Ivory Coast and the Millennium Development goals focusing on education and analyse how the Ivory Coast is doing as far as progress toward those goals..... it's due in 13 hours.
so naturally I will have to feed my dogs, which puts me in sight of my family who snag me for a 10 min. conversation about if we agree that we are hungry, if we should order or cook, and what to cook now that we've decided to cook, and then i break free from that only to sit on my couch where by now i have forgotten that i have a drink propped precariously in the corner on the cushion. I plop down and down comes my drink as well. fortunately not on my lappy which contains the only copy of said paper, but instead all over me and into the crease of my micro-suede couch that I bought for a whopping $600. So i sacrifice some warm clothing to sop up some of the drink before it absorbs too much into the couch. grab a towel to soak up the rest, apparently acrylic sweater-blankets don't soak up much booze. I throw the cushions off the couch to discover the damage and make sure the sides are also clean, only to realize that the bed part of the sofa-bed couch is also gathering a puddle. I take all the cushions off, move the coffee table, and pull out the bed to wipe that off. I get that all taken care of with the towel and a dirty sock that is on the floor next to me and try to put the bed back. Naturally the top of the bed should slip off the edge so trying to fold it back into the sitting position is nearly impossible because the mattress is bunching in such a way that prevents further movement. I re fold the bed two more times before i figure out that i can hook the edge of the mattress around the edge of the frame and that will hold it in the correct position for folding. how i ever got this thing folded up in the first place is a wonder to me. anyway, i get it folded and now that I'm half naked and what clothes i used to have on are now soaking with booze i decided to put more clothes on, throw the previous outfit and some work clothes for tomorrow into the washer, but i forget MY laundry soap downstairs, (I really hate Fabreeze and that is the ONLY thing my family buys, so i get myself ALL) so i go back only to get more clothes rather than laundry soap, so one more time i go down stairs and back up, nearly getting taken out by my Little dog because she is so excited about me going up and down the stairs that she wants in on the fun of going up and down too. I also take my dad's shirts out of the dryer and take them up stairs to their room which may have turned out to be a mistake because on my way back down stairs, since I'm again within sight of the family, my mom asks me about helping my brother register for classes. I ask when he needs to be registered - he doesn't know - so mom says the sooner the better. I say I'll get my paper done and then be on the way to helping him. I get back down stairs and put the couch back together pick up my computer just in time for it to log out. (Horray!) I log back in to find that part of the logging out process is that all of my applications have been closed and all information i may have not saved prior to throwing off my clothing to save my couch from a booze bath is now gone. Fortunately, lappy (my lap top's name) has decided it likes me enough to recover files. cool. BUT! it also has decided to keep my applications up to date which on another occasion is nothing to worry about. Today Lappy decided that Safari needed to be updated. Now seeing as thought this paper is a research paper, i need the Internet and Lappy is insistent when it comes to updates, and i was not allowed to use Safari until it was done updating... including a reboot of the computer. -Awesome - Reboot started, and i went upstairs to get another drink... Mikes' hard lemonade original if anyone cares.. the dogs are begging to go out, so i let them, go back down stairs and re-log onto my computer this time i had remembered to save, therefore i have not lost anything. I put the room back together sit down to write and no sooner than when i get all of the windows associated with the various parts of writing this paper open does my dad then stand at the top of the stairs turning the hall light on and off like a strobe. this may seem odd, but when you live in the basement you are either summoned by banging on the floor, or flashing lights (i believe this could be the reason SOME families have intercoms or radios or... legs... but not my family) so i shout up (mind you i can see his feet from where I'm sitting) "Yes papa?" ...... nothing, more flashing..... "yeah?"....... flashing........ i walk over the 15 feet to the bottom of the stairs and ask what's up. "Are you hungry?" admittedly he was not in the 10 min conversation about hunger and the unanimous agreement that we are in fact hungry, but still. i ask "so does that mean dinner is ready?" his reply "if you want it." So i go upstairs so that i can wait in line to serve up dinner. While putting the last bits into my bowl i ask "so are we sitting together?" now just to let you know something, it's a challenge to get everyone to sit at the table and there are only 4 of us in the house right now, so eating together is both rare and therefore cherished, but rare and therefore of course what we are going to do now that i have a paper to write. We sit together and eat. it was good family time, but this situation struck me so funny that i had to write about it, so now that i have lengthened this battle with the latest windmill by blogging about it. I'm off to write a paper on the Ivory Coast.
C'et la Vie!

10 November 2009

topics for future blogging

Why i need a first responder BF
Crisis intervention homework being done in ERs
Creepy date Chris
Match.com drama queens
Girraffe fleas
my infinate luck - both actual luck and not so lucky luck.


Suggestions are welcome.
I have said in the past that i have a bazzar story for almost all topics, so go for it! test me!

20 August 2009

To satrt...

I have for some time believed that my life is the stuff of long-running dry and scarcasticly hilarious sitcoms.

I have thus decided to post the sitcom-worthy material in one place.

Unfortunately I will not be able to drudge up the past, although it would be worth the laugh for all the hard work.
Maybe later.

Most recently I have had both of my dogs attempt to break parts of my body.

First it was my older dog Rajah. I had taken both Rajah and Amelia to the park to play. I often take them to the park by my house so they can run and play. I do not like taking them on lead because they tend to over-power me and I become the one that is being taken for a walk, rather than the other way around. Additionally, they stay out of trafic and come when i call so they themselves are really less trouble off lead than on lead. However, there are the neighbors. Specifically there is a middle aged woman who smells like burnt eggs that walks what looks to be a border collie pomeranian mix around the same time we go to the park. The woman will often scoop up the 40-50 lbs dog protecting it from my 60 pounds wet Catahoula, Amelia. The only thing I have ever heard this woman say is "seriously!?!" ... seriously what i'm not sure, but that seriously is a dog who is not on lead and you seriously are protecting your dog that is about her size... so yeah, seriously.

Anyhow, we were playing frisbee in said park. I was throwing it in the oposite direction of this woman who still had her strange looking fluff ball up in her arms. After a few rounds i sat in the shade and would throw from the ground. This was a perfectly wonderful idea until Rajah decided he wanted to be as close as possible to the frisbee when it was released from my hand. This resulted in a full speed swing to his face. There was a puncture wound on the back of my hand between my first and middle fingers and Rajah was crouched down as he does when he is saying sorry for chewing a hole in my mom's carpet. my hand swelled up and i couldn't close my fist. Naturally I started summer school classes the next day, and it hurt to write because I broke my dominant hand on my dog's face. Later that week after much prodding from my family, I went to the ER and had my hand ex-rayed. Turns out it was NOT broken, but just badly sprained. A few days of ice and splinting cleared it up.

Yesterday I was wrestling with my dogs. They like to growl and I like to grab their feet, it's a good game. Anyway I was on all fours wrestling and had grabbed the smaller dog Amelia and tucked her under me. Rajah started growling at my head so i tucked that under as well just as Amelia was spazing to get out from underneith me. The crown of her head caught the underside of my nose and my nose was swiftly pushed up and back toward my brain. Just like in the good martial arts movies or the ones about the underdog kids that get lessons on how to fight the bully one trick they always use is the judo nose breaking skill. My little dog Amelia is apparently a ninja. I don't think that my nose is ACTUALLY broken (just like my "broken" hand from Rajah) because I do not have black eyes. However I do have a swolen septum and I can't actually blow my nose without doubling over in pain. I've been icing and elivating (easy to do if the injury is on your head) hopefully I'll be able to wipe my nose soon.

So why not! why shouldn't haveing dogs mean that I will also have broken body parts due to spending time with them.